Mother's Day is fast approaching. When my son Dustin was killed in 2005 I remember the next morning looking into a mirror and asking myself, "Who am I now? For 17 years I have been a Mom and in an instant that is all gone."
It took me a while to realize I was still a Mom but on Mother's Day I go visit my child at the cemetery not their home. I will take a lawn chair and set it up there by his side and talk to him for a while. Play some of his favorites songs while there and leave. It is so tough.
Meanwhile I am so blessed to have my Mom living with us. Well I say blessed but not that I wanted Daddy to die but when he did she was afraid to live in the country by herself. As Daddy was dying I told him it was okay to let go that I would take care of Mom as he had done for 64 years.
Having my best friend, Mom here is an experience I didn't appreciate growing up when she was MOM and laying down the rules which now I am so glad she did.
Please remember that just because my Dustin is gone that I am still a Mom. Feel free to wish me Happy Mother's Day because being his Mom was the greatest joy ever.
